Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Twosome Tuesday: Things I'd Do Differently, Part 1

I have thought of 6 things (so far, anyway), that I would do differently after my experience with the 2 weddings we had this summer.

1)  Choosing colors, specifically for bridesmaids' dresses.  Not that this is something over which the mother of the bride has control, but I would encourage any bride not to set the wedding colors before seeing what's available in dresses, styles, and even napkins and plates, that she will like.  
When one hits the shopping mall with a preset "perfect" color in mind, it's not always easy to meet the dream.  As we shopped, we saw dresses and dresses the girls could have loved, if they were the 'right' color.  I kept thinking that if the color hadn't been chosen first, they could've fallen in love with dresses, and been happy to make the color work, too.  

If the color itself is that important, I would elect to head for the fabric store, find the color in fabric and get patterns for appropriate dresses.  It may seem like a time savings to shop and find ready-made dresses.  I can say that sure wasn't the case for either of our weddings.

2)  Invitations.  I have mixed emotions about having printed our own invitations.  It was great to personalize them, deciding our own wording and even adding a photo of the couple to Prince Steadfast's and Princess Sassy's.  With their wedding and reception, requiring 2 different types of invitations, and with Princess Bossy's small wedding, it only made economical sense to create our own....Maybe.  

It did cost more, per invitation, for smaller quantities of printed invitations, of course.  But when we had to buy 2 types for Bossy, after the first ones wouldn't accept the printer ink, and then with both, because of the square envelopes, we had to pay additional postage, the savings were decreased.  
--And they took a LONG time to print, since most home printers, ours included, are a little touchy and need the invitations to be fed, one at a time.  Also, they need constant supervision, since, for whatever reason, 40-some invitations will print just fine, then the next one will print half off the page.  

The other issue for me had to do with the invitation styles we bought from what was readily available.  When I was considering ordering custom printed invitations from Einvite.com, I made sure we'd have the classic, formal invitations with inner envelopes.  The options available at Michaels didn't offer a double envelope design.  I was sad about that, but thought maybe that was an unnecessary and out-dated concept, and decided to let it go.  I wish I would've thought that through more.

Image from Invitations4Less.com
I think the lack of double envelopes caused some confusion, and possibly, hurt feelings.  It is customary, and good manners, to allow people to bring a guest to accompany them.  But you don't indicate that on the address, but usually, on the inner envelope.  The outside might be addressed to "Mr. John Smith," but the inside would say "John and guest."  This problem showed itself, especially for a member of the wedding party who had a girlfriend not close to the couple.  She felt 'not invited,' and he didn't know what to do, and was too shy to ask. It also would've been nice to be able to let older, widowed great aunts and uncles that they were certainly free to bring anyone they wanted who might drive them or keep them company.  It just isn't possible to contact everyone individually to let them know, and the inner envelope would've solved the problem quite easily.

3)  Dessert.  I have talked about this before on Two Thoughts on Wedding Cakes, Part 1 and Two Thoughts on Wedding Cakes, Part 2, so won't go into too much detail.  Again, not something the mother of the bride will have control over, 
but I will encourage the younger princesses when they marry to have whatever kinds of desserts they want and use a much smaller wedding cake, or to use a style of cake that employs several free-standing cakes instead of the tall tiers.  

I have given you enough to read today, so will continue this next week...

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